I feel like shit (potentially affecting my relationship)

[Balaallen123]

I'm getting married early next year and I'm feeling very overwhelmed by what transpired yesterday. It was my first time in a long time going to JB. Didn't expect much as I only wanted a massage. Long story short, me and ML teased each other and I didn't think clearly at that point and I was horny that I asked if can do vaginal intercourse a bit and she at first hesitated cause of the noise then allowed me to. Just putting it in and trusting for about 10 seconds, I ejaculated into her. Everything. After ejaculation and my dick being in there for another good 5-8 seconds. I suddenly realised I fucked up big big time.

After the massage, the masseuse didn't make a big fuss of it (she's Viet). Looks to be in her mid 30s or early 40s. Paid her and was about to leave when she suddenly took her phone out while on a video call with someone and I can see she's clearly pointing at my direction. i suspect taking a photo of me. Anyone encountered this situation before? What if she took a photo of me as proof and happens to be pregnant then tried to get some ah long to find me? Or threatend me to in sg to go back and find her to be responsible for the kid? And potentially my fiance finding one

So now I'm extremely paranoid. I've already gone to doctors this morning and prescribed PEP. Will do regular checkup as well for other std. In the meantime, I may have to come up with excuse for no sex till I'm cleared.

I feel like absolute shit. That 20 seconds of pleasure was not worth the after thought and now im just so defeated. My wallet is burned from the PEP. My relationship with fiance could also be potentially ruined if I come up with some STD. But I'm more concerned about the ML getting pregnant and finding me, leading to my fiance knowledge on the matter and everything we've planned for is now in shambles.

I feel super remorseful. I can't function normally. Everytime I see my fiancé planning out wedding, I feel like crying and hope I just die before that.

Can anyone advice? I'm taking measures right now to get myself medicated and tested for 1 month, 3 and 6. Anything I should be doing to stay calm and not worry?

[kaypohkia]

Bro there is definitely a tiny chance of what you are worried about happening but in my opinion you're thinking too much. At least for the MLs i've seen, they don't seem to be interested in such things. And they are probably on birth control or some hormones implant, especially those who allow RAW.

I actually was kind of in your shoes many years back. Shot into a WL overseas and while she reassured me she was on birth control, I was still worried. Thankfully Facebook recommended me her profile for some reason and months later when I checked there was no child.

Perhaps you can try to find her contact and observe too? But yeah chances are really probably low in my opinion. Perhaps other bros can advice too.

It sounds like you are feeling very remorseful to the point it's affecting your daily life though. I'm not sure what your relationship is like with your fiance, but if it persists, is there any chance you can come clean and seek forgiveness?

Because in some ways you sound like me, like the type of guy who overthinks is also feels very guilty for keeping his loved ones in the dark.

Like for me it was me getting into a relationship with a WL (ex-gf now), and then letting her take a nap with my 2-year-old niece. My sister was very upset because at that point I had yet to introduce my ex-gf to her and she is protective (understandably so) of her girl.

I did not dare reveal that my ex-gf was an ex-WL as I knew my sister would be even more upset, though to me I knew despite my ex-gf's past, she was a good person at heart, though perhaps with some issues of her own.

For 2 months or so I felt extremely guilty for keeping that fact from my sister. I couldn't function normally around her too.

Until one day I just couldn't take it anymore, called my sister and told her the truth, and that I was very sorry.

I was lucky that my sister wasn't too upset (she wasn't even upset haha), as long as I stopped letting my ex-gf be around her children until she knew her better.

Just my 2 cents.

Edit: I read your other post in the other forum and saw that many guys suggested you keep it with you till grave. Perhaps that might be better but for myself i'm the type that I have to be honest with people or else I just feel too uncomfortable, and believe others should know the truth and have the autonomy to decide if they want to forgive and stay or leave. That said I'm a greenhorn when it comes to relationships, so probably not the best advice.

[chubbybastard]

Originally Posted by Balaallen123

I'm getting married early next year and I'm feeling very overwhelmed by what transpired yesterday. It was my first time in a long time going to JB. Didn't expect much as I only wanted a massage. Long story short, me and ML teased each other and I didn't think clearly at that point and I was horny that I asked if can do vaginal intercourse a bit and she at first hesitated cause of the noise then allowed me to. Just putting it in and trusting for about 10 seconds, I ejaculated into her. Everything. After ejaculation and my dick being in there for another good 5-8 seconds. I suddenly realised I fucked up big big time.

After the massage, the masseuse didn't make a big fuss of it (she's Viet). Looks to be in her mid 30s or early 40s. Paid her and was about to leave when she suddenly took her phone out while on a video call with someone and I can see she's clearly pointing at my direction. i suspect taking a photo of me. Anyone encountered this situation before? What if she took a photo of me as proof and happens to be pregnant then tried to get some ah long to find me? Or threatend me to in sg to go back and find her to be responsible for the kid? And potentially my fiance finding one

So now I'm extremely paranoid. I've already gone to doctors this morning and prescribed PEP. Will do regular checkup as well for other std. In the meantime, I may have to come up with excuse for no sex till I'm cleared.

I feel like absolute shit. That 20 seconds of pleasure was not worth the after thought and now im just so defeated. My wallet is burned from the PEP. My relationship with fiance could also be potentially ruined if I come up with some STD. But I'm more concerned about the ML getting pregnant and finding me, leading to my fiance knowledge on the matter and everything we've planned for is now in shambles.

I feel super remorseful. I can't function normally. Everytime I see my fiancé planning out wedding, I feel like crying and hope I just die before that.

Can anyone advice? I'm taking measures right now to get myself medicated and tested for 1 month, 3 and 6. Anything I should be doing to stay calm and not worry?

You raw-ed then creampied the ML and you're getting married next year? Good luck bro. If you get STD during your matrimonial check-up your wedding is over. I think you better be honest with your Fiance and pray hard she forgives you. If not move on with another girl. Otherwise if she found out after marriage, after you had kids , you're even more deep shit. The Women's charter is gonna pawn you deep deep. You will have much much much more to lose. You kid, your property, your savings, your career, everything. Gone in an instant. Better to own up now and face the consequences since you're still only engaged not married yet.

[fallen11]

bro
that was your moment of weakness
if you fell into such traps so easily
shoot inside an old ML
i doubt you will survive your marriage life
just wait till an syt comes into your life...

postpone it or cancel it, its the better choice...

there are fucking full of temptations out there.

[Darge]

Single is best. 😆

[BatamBro]

Firstly, avoid that parlor moving forward.
Make sure none of your friends know, if not kena sabo one day also jialat
She take photo of you so what? That was in JB.
As long as you did not give any of your information with the shop before massage or exchange contact with her.. can already.
She bring your photo to SG and ask around also no use.
___________________________________
Continue the regular check up for STDs
Use condom with your girl for now
Don't need to be transparent about it and ruin your relationship.
There is no such thing as transparency after marriage.
Don't damage the trust and peace.
Everyone has their own secrets, own space and own privacy.
This type of thing no need to cry or feel like dying. Good luck

[owlette]

Originally Posted by Balaallen123

Can anyone advice? I'm taking measures right now to get myself medicated and tested for 1 month, 3 and 6. Anything I should be doing to stay calm and not worry?

i suggest that if you cannot kick this habit, dont get married better.

i nothing to do go and bio all your posts. you already "laojiao" in this field since you started very young based on your posts also. you from take allowance from parents save money for such activities to i assume now you are actually working with your own $. last time restricted by $, now restricted by what?

marriage not gonna stop you. at most temporarily.